#for the worst thing that has happened to them when there is wood to cut things to make stuff to do

[edith-is-a-cat]

how would eboni feel if/when they find out that yu blames them for taking away trinh :3

Oh that fucking thing probably would avoid him like the plague i already know that instead of going outside first week shes alive she would stay inside for maybe a week or two not trying to have a heart attack when there is a major god. but knowing one of them blames him for doing something that he could never fix or make right oh that would just send her, i can imagine her at the hearth tending the fire, reading a book, doing what ever hobby has her this time and seeing Yu and just vanishing. she could never really stand to face him after she learnt and probably would fuck up herself really bad over it. Tbh shes just like me in how she avoids stress and how it gets trigger, me thinks even waking up in the morning to tend to the hearth will stress him out.

oh and i just twisted my hand really bad and it hurts

[useless-catalanfacts]

Something very strange happened, and I think we need to have a talk about the way some people who don't know about Catalan culture misrepresent the Tió (our pre-Christian Christmas present-bringer, a log who poops presents 🪵🎁).

I have a relative who is a teacher in an adult school, she teaches Catalan language (mostly to immigrants). Some days ago, they were doing an activity about Catalan holidays, and two of her students said that Tió should be banned and that it's the worst thing they have ever heard. My relative was very shocked and asked why they could say such a thing (imagine, it's like saying Santa Claus should be banned in the USA). Their reasoning was that they completely misunderstood everything about it. These people are native Spanish speakers and assumed that the Catalan word "tió" (meaning "log" 🪵) means the same as the Spanish word "tío" (meaning "uncle"), even though both words are pronounced differently. They believed that the Tió represents a man and that we tell children to beat people up, so much until they poop themselves, threatening them to give us things. They said it promotes violence to children and that it's disgusting. Nothing further from the truth.

This is not an isolated incident because a few days ago I saw a post on Tumblr repeating this same mistake. I texted the person who posted it saying that it's not called "Poop Uncle" but "Christmas Log" and they said that this was what they were taught by their teacher (this person is from a different continent), and haven't taken down the post. I have also seen comments on Instagram repeating the same and making fun of how gross and violent it is.

The real meaning of Tió

The Log is a way of symbolically passing down our relation with nature. This is how the tradition works:

In early December, we get a log and bring him home. We take care of him: we keep him in a warm place, with a blanket over him, and we feed him things like orange/clementine peels and walnut shells. On Christmas day, all the family comes together. Children get wooden sticks and go get ready in another room, meanwhile adults place presents under the Log's blanket. Children come back and hit the Log while singing a song. There are many local variants of the song but they all come down to asking the Log to poop us good food. When they have finished singing the song, the children remove the blanket and discover the presents that the Log has pooped. Years ago (now this is only done by some farmer families in rural areas, but back in the day this was generalized), the Log was burned in the house's fireplace and its ashes were spread on the fields, believed to act as a magical fertilizer.

Notice what this whole "ritual" has been about: we take care of nature, nature takes care of us, we are part of a whole and there's no real difference between "nature" and "us" because we all give life to each other. After the winter rest, we wake up nature (the Tió) so it will bring fruits and light again.

We take a log from the forest and bring it home. We do this for the Winter Solstice because it's the time of the return of light and the rebirth of nature after the winter sleep, and wood symbolizes the most important things for human life: food, warmth and light. It's difficult for us to imagine nowadays because we are used to electricity, but for our ancestors who only had oil lamps, fire and candles, darkness was almost absolute for many hours in winter, and that's why the Winter Solstice was very important because it meant that light is coming back. We want something from the Log, his fire will allow us to cook, it will give us light, and keep us warm. So we offer him the same: we feed him (notice what we feed it, too: a kind of compost, which is complimentary to human food), we keep him warm, and we love him. Then, we hit him with sticks (mimicking the motion of cutting down a tree) and ask him to give us food, and he does. Then, our ancestors used to burn him for warmth and light, and then take him back to plants spreading his ashes so it will give life to the fields. Which in turn will give us food again, which we will poop and it will fertilize plants again. And it's a cycle that never ends, we're all part of a whole.

We give to the forests, the forests can grow with the remains that all living creatures leave on its ground: leafs, excrements, the remains of parts of our food like nuts and fruit peels. These things give life to the forest. And the forest gives life to us: gives us fruits and wood (=light and warmth). We take these things, and in return we give to forests once again.

Nowadays, the part about warmth and light is often lost to kids, but the part about food is still obvious, even if subconsciously. This is why the Log is not the horrible barbaric tradition that the "haha poop and violence" crowd would make you believe.

And don't get me wrong, it can still be funny! We're the first ones to make jokes about it. And you can, too! But don't spread false ideas: the Spanish word "uncle" appears nowhere near this tradition because it doesn't have anything to do with uncles nor with Spanish-speaking cultures. It's called the Christmas Log (Tió de Nadal, Soca de Nadal, Tronca de Nadal, Tizón de Nadal, etc depending on the area, all meaning "Christmas Log") and it's celebrated by the Catalan people and a part of the Occitan and Pyrenean Aragonese people. The word "poop" (as an imperative verb, as in "please poop for us") appears in the song, but not in the name.

I know that, now that misinformation has gone viral, a post won't stop it. But I hope at least people with a genuine interest can learn some more. By all means, keep laughing! Make all the memes you want! But knowing the whole story will give you understanding. And, please, don't argue in favour of banning our cultural practises, we've had enough of that for centuries.

[saetiate]

cora! this event is such a cute idea :’) humbly requesting temperance with rin itoshi please. gn reader is fine!

itoshi rin x reader (gender neutral), wound-tending, fluff wc: 0.5k ❥ valentines event (requests still open!), co-written with @venustrvck a/n: AAAH i feel so nervous u r the first req i'm posting :')) THANK YOU SM for participating friend !!!

There's blood. More blood than he thought, down his face, down the sink. It trickles down the curve of white porcelain and coalesces at the bottom; rivers of blood conjoining into a lake.

There's a knock at the door. "Rin."

He ignores it. Who would want their partner to see them like this? Bleeding out his nose and his cheek. Weak, Sae would say. Lukewarm.

"If you don't open this door," the white lacquered wood separates you, a barrier he's put up on purpose, muffling your voice. "I'm going to break the door down."

Rin snorts. Like that's about to happen. He draws a stinging line down his cheek as he slides an alcohol-soaked cotton across the cut.

"You think I can't do it? Haven't you seen those videos where babies get stuck under cars and the mothers lift the car?"

The door swings open, his long arm catching it at the edge. Rin's hair is in his face, bangs clinging to his forehead with sweat. He's giving you the worst side-eye, bright blue shining in slits from behind his strands under the unforgiving bathroom light. "I'm not your baby."

You step into his space, too close for his comfort, not close enough for his needs. Let yourself into this part of him that he's been trying to hide from you. "You might as well be."

Rin busies himself with his reflection, making every attempt to ignore you, ignore the unfurling shame in his gut, despite your concerned face creeping through his side-view.

"How bad is it?"

Rin doesn't answer. You cup the uncut side of his face with one hand.

"I'm here for you. You can show me."

Warm hands enclose his own as you gingerly grasp the cotton pad; you take it away with gentle fingers. He doesn't turn. He doesn't look at you. Your voice turns into something gentle. "Let me do this for you."

He wants to hide. Wants to run away. That furrowed space between your brows is the last thing he wants to see. He can't do either of those things, so he closes his eyes.

And then all he knows is your warmth, your body pressed against his. There's the sound of shuffling, and a new, cool alcohol-dipped cotton ball is pressed to his cheek. He wants to hiss at the contact, but he bites the inside of his cheek instead. He's shown enough weakness to you today.

"It's okay, Rin." You say it almost knowingly, your hand moves to the back of his neck, bringing him down so you can better reach. "There's nothing wrong with letting someone else take care of you."

You think he mumbles your name.

"It's me, isn't it?" You're so close to him that your nose brushes against his. The cotton pad moves down over the abrasion on his jaw, clearing away the grime and leaving rough, red skin in its wake.

"It's just me, so you can show me if it hurts. No one else has to know."

It's like a cleansing of sorts, his body relaxing against the counter, leaning his face into your hands. A cleansing from the situation, from all the times he wasn't able to say what he needed. Don't you know that there are those who would take without remorse, what you give to him so freely?

This time, when you press against his wound, his hand tightens where it holds your waist.

[sharp-silver4795]

The Creepypasta’s Worst Injuries

I get some inspo from “HC Prompt” posts and that’s what I got going on rn!

⚠️DISCLAIMERS⚠️

BLOOD: Mentions of injuries (ofc), graphic details in some of them, and just blood. Weapons will be mentioned, including guns.

INJURY: the situation is explained and can be a lil uncomfortable- but idk. Severe injury or explicit imagery.

SOURCE: Some of these are product of self harm, betrayal, attempted murder, abuse, general assault, or common causes of death.

ALL SENSITIVE TOPICS WILL BE MARKED AHEAD OF IT!!!

Mild Mention > Detailed > Extreme Details > Sensitive Content

Proxy Behavior miscellaneous

Details of how the injury happened. Jumping, defenselessness, detail of scars and the origin of them. Extreme detail of how the injuries occurred, attempted murder, Marble Hornets Spoilers, ig? Car accidents/injuries

Wilson, Zechariah, Neon Spike, and Rogue will not be included. They’re too sheltered smh 🤦

Kat Hunter: he once got shot 7 times by a few police officers. The other proxies came to his rescue.

Kate the Chaser: once got cornered by Bloody Angel and Scarecrow. She ended up bloodied due to being scratched, hacked at, stabbed, and all sorts of things. The most prominent ones were on her face and thigh. Bloody Angel had kept grabbing her legs to keep her from getting away. Bloody Angel has claws. Scarecrow has gloves very similar to that of Rouge and clawed down Kate’s face. Kate’s face was exposed in the first place because she got hot and couldn’t breathe, so she was jumped basically.

Brian/Hoodie: Fell from a two story building… duh

Tim/Masky: got into a tussle with Alex…

Ticci Toby: Car accident. Even though he didn’t feel the physical pain.

Depression

graphic/horrific death, freak accidents, Self harm, attempted suicide, Religious stuff/demons, mourning

Nathan the Nobody: Masky rocked his shit.

BEN Drowned: accidentally electrocuted himself and couldn’t stop glitching and getting bent and twisted

Eyeless Jack: he does by biting his own tail and literally exploding his organs-

Clockwork: she got skewered, but somehow survived.

Jeff, Jane, and Nina the Killer: burned alive ofc

Puppeteer: Liu wears a rosary to remember his mother…

Liu Woods: when he was alive, he used scissors to cut at his shoulders and chest. He cut at his arms, legs, and abdomen as well. He nearly bled out in his bathroom.

Zero: she stabbed herself with glass shards cuz she had a mental breakdown

Kagekao: purposely ran into oncoming traffic.

This is what happens when you mess with kids

severe injury/free amputation

Jason the Toymaker: kid ripped out a ton of his hair and made his head bleed

Laughing Jack: got his arms cut off somehow- they grew back tho

Laughing Jill: a parent hit her upside the head and her own chainsaw went through her chest and abdomen

Clumsy Bitches

Mutilation, stupidity , how the fuck did they survive this shit? segments of body being removed and explicit injury mention(?), Experiments, self inflicted injury

Ani the Wight: existing in summer heat

Chess Master: boinked his head, tripped, and landed on the grass… off of a 10m tall tree

Candy Pop: fell off a building. He’s clumsy.

Bloody Painter: he jumped off a building and landed safely, then stepped on a bear trap. How does that even happen?!

Bloody Angel: her whole thing is that she got mutelated into a monseter by a crazy circus… do the math.

X-Virus: while working on a project and it exploded in his face. So, he now has giant burn scars on his face, neck, and chest.

Judge Angels: Rouge kicked her ass and she has claw-like gloves. She ended up with scars on her face for a long while.

Scarecrow: Hoodie once cut her in half with a tree branch.

Doll Maker: Stabbed himself in the eye

Divider Creds: Sister Lucifer; adorneswithlight

Header Creds: ME!!!

[notmorbid]

the reformatory.

dialogue prompts from the reformatory by tananarive due.

why'd you do a fool thing like that?

don't run barefoot.

school is holier than church.

everyone knowing your name isn't always a blessing.

i can speak for myself.

what's got into you?

you little shit.

you pushed me first.

what would ____ have done?

not all stories are suited for the ears of children.

you can only trust explosive secrets with three people, maybe four.

we should have run away when we had the chance.

you talk too damn much.

we'll get there faster if we cut through the woods.

sometimes life throws you a curveball, and you end up in places you never expected.

are the stories true?

i've never seen a more superstitious place.

there's no such thing as ghosts. that's an absolute fact.

evil is never plain to the eye.

stop fretting. just makes it worse.

sometimes the only justice is a hot meal and a bed to sleep in.

you know how to cook?

it could've been last week, for how well i remember it.

you think i don't know an evil eye when i see one?

if you're dead, stay dead.

you're scared of your shadow. always jumping.

who is it? who locked the door?

none of you can take a joke.

you seem more tired than usual.

you can talk sense when you want to.

men do evil every day and call it 'doing their job'.

i've heard all i can stand.

this is only a season, and it will pass. no matter what happens.

you don't bother me, i won't bother you.

you talk too damn much.

say you're sorry. put it behind you.

there's more ahead for you than this.

this isn't everything. there's more than this.

stories are dangerous.

if i needed you to, you'd cover for me?

no one stays nice. best to remember it.

go on. ask me what i know.

i wish i could say i had good news.

get a good cry out if you want.

you're not as smart about the world as you think you are.

no good talk starts at a bar.

mama used to say that unaired feelings ate you up inside.

i'm sorry. i've got no right to blame you.

don't tell your business on the phone.

hush that damn foolishness.

don't you be sick in my truck.

sometimes the worst thing happens. usually, in fact.

how do you believe in god, with all the bad things?

this whole world is a lie, the bad things and the good things.

you've got an answer for everything, don't you?

it's like you can see every thought in my head.

what did i ever do to you?

don't talk about my parents.

don't talk like you know anything about me.

everybody won't see. but you might.

telling the truth always breaks the peace.

one thing i've learned: everything seems fine, until it ain't. and then we come to see it wasn't ever fine.

i was never allowed to have nicknames.

____ made me feel like i mattered.

be strong. like _____. can you do that?

it'll be alright, as long as you tell the truth.

all a man has in the world is his name. your name outlives you.

i tried to tell you, didn't i?

you're so dumb. not the dumbest i've ever seen, but pretty damn close.

you don't get to ask about ____.

if you see me run, follow behind. no matter what.

please let me do something to help.

they wear you down one wrong at a time.

we should use a code to talk about it.

never give up a chance to laugh.

i'm beyond your help.

being dead isn't so bad.

you thought i didn't know?

does anyone remember you?

you need me, just like i need you.

constant worry steals everything from you.

i don't like strangers in my house.

you need a place to stay, and i have a spare room.

sometimes we say a thing to try to believe it.

i don't know what game you're playing, but it's a dangerous one.

the secret to war is the sacrifices friends make for each other.

we don't all sit around in a clubhouse. is that what you think?

let it out. but when you're done crying, we need to go over the plan.

wait a minute. just slow down.

we're no better than them.

some mistakes you don't come back from.

everything is a trick with you.

i don't want to kill anybody. not even ____.

[redheadspark]

Can i Ask for an Oliver Wood x female reader, with promote 1 were reader is like very smart and they are like enemies to lovers or something. Only if you want of course😊

A/N - YAS! This will be cute for Oliver! Thanks for requesting this, anon!

Poke

Summary - You and Oliver were always at each other's necks....until now

Warnings - Just some cute fluff

“You can cut it with a knife,”

“You think so?”

“Come on, look at them!”

Ron looked over at the small argument that unfolded in front of them out on the lawn.  It was between you and Oliver Wood, two captains from rival teams that were bickering with each other on practice times on the pitch.  It was awkward mostly, since both Gryffindor and Ravenclaw teams were awkwardly waiting on the sidelines to see who was going to win the verbal spat between their Captains.  But this was no real shocker to either team nor was it the first time this has happened.

In fact, this was the fourth time this season alone.

“You’ve always hogged the pitch twenty minutes longer than what’s on the practice schedule, Wood!  You needed the extra time because your team’s sloppy?!”

“Come off it, Jones!  You must be that bored in counting the minutes until we leave the pitch to gloss up your maneuvers.  They’re pathetic!”

“Bloody hell, this is one the worst ones,” Rom grumble as he leaned against his broom that was propped up.  His twin brothers were overseeing with small looks of amusement on their faces, arms folded in front of themselves, and looking at their mannerisms and how close you both were at poking each other’s chest with rigid fingers.  Of course, to the others that were watching this weren’t seeing what the twins were seeing.  They were seeing two Captains who hated each other fight overtime on the pitch.

Where as the twins saw two Captains who had it bad for each other.

Ever since you became Captain of the Ravenclaw team Oliver was intimidated by you since you were sharp and had a great wit about Quidditch.  Like Oliver, you grew up on the sport and knew it far more than most of the students at Hogwarts, becoming a Chaser your second year and then Captain a few years later.  Although your love for Quidditch was not as intense as Oliver’s, it was still there and you were smart in your tactics and plays to make Raveclaw a challenging team to beat.  Gryffindor was the top competitor against them, not even Slytherin could handle themselves again Ravenclaw when you were the Captain.  But Oliver saw you as a threat, your eyes ever trained on your teammates and knowing how to stay a few steps ahead of others.  

Arguments between you two became a regular ritual, though it would get far too heated at times about Flitwick and McGonagall having to have talks with you two.  Of course, you felt bad that you were making such a scene, you knew better since you were representing your House.  Then again, you were letting someone like Oliver get under your skin and fester there.  His stubbornness, his fiery temper, and his thirst to win, it always rubbed you wrong.  It didn’t make things better that you were also harboring a crush on him.  His handsomeness in his face and smile, his playing ability in Quidditch, it gave you butterflies when you didn’t really want it.

So your relationship with Oliver was…complicated?

“I bet you 5 galleons she pokes his chest,” George said to his twin as you and Oliver were still arguing back at forth.

“You’re on,” Fred replied as he shook George’s hand.  The rest of the players were watching and almost talking to each other as there was a pause in your argument, finally.  You and Oliver were nearly nose to nose, but there was a sense of ease then as you both were taking a breath.  You realized that arguing with him was not going to make things better, only worse.  You inhaled deeply, looking over at your players in their blue robes and you sighed.  The last thing you wanted to do was make this worse for them, and perhaps this was an eye-opening moment for you as you looked back at Oliver.  He saw the shift in you too, the fire in your eyes was no longer there and you were simply yourself.

“Go ahead,” You replied, Oliver’s eyes going a bit wide as you picked up your broom that was by your boots on the grassy ground, “We’ll go over plays and practice tomorrow,”

Oliver was shocked that you gave in easily, you gripped your room tightly in your fingerless gloves as you were about to walk away.  He reached over and placed a hand on your arm, not in a grip but just a simple press of his fingers along your blue robes.  You looked at the contact, seeing his fingers near your wrist and how you could almost feel the heat of his skin through your robe.

“You…you sure?” He asked, his voice low and almost uncertain as the heat in his voice was also gone. You two locked eyes again, close enough for him to count your freckles and for you to see the specs in his brown eyes as you nodded.  Now that you were close, you were feeling butterflies and almost weak in the knees. 

“It’s not a big deal, honestly.  We’ll come out to practice tomorrow, don’t worry about…Oliver,”

Oliver felt his own heart skip a beat from you saying his name, and he gulped and nodded his head slowly.  You smiled, for the first time at him and he softly smiled too.  But before he could walk over to his own team, you gently poked his chest with one finger.

“Make sure you tell your Beaters to not be sloppy with their swings.” You advised him, then turned on your heels to walk off. Your team followed you, asking you what happened and why you had the change of heart as Oliver stood there in shock and looked on at your backside.  Without him realizing it, he touched the spot on his chest where your finger touched, gasping like a fish.  

George grinned, looking over at Fred with his hand out, “You owe me 5,”

“Shut it,”

The End.

January Prompt Session

Tagged - @a-lumos-in-the-nox

[comingdownwithme]

what do they do now that they’ve seen each other?

and how long does it take toby to eventually become fond of jeff again?

When they first saw each other, Jeff was fucking elated. In that moment, he wasn't "Jeff the Killer", a wanted man, dead or alive for a growing number of homicides, instead, he was Jeffery Woods, known teen troublemaker, eldest brother of a four person family, and a lost man who had damned himself to hell when he took out his grief and rage in the worst way possible after that night of the fire.

The man was desperate for that sense of familiarity, a sense of normalcy, of home, and there he was, just out of reach.

But for Toby, the bane of his existence was there, just within swinging distance.

And so, the proxy attacks.

Jeff would move on instinct, swinging first before he could even think.

The guilt that followed when he realised he had left a long, clean line from Toby's chest up to his shoulder still eats at him to this very day, stinging far worse than the deep cut Toby had left when he swung his axe into his side.

Jeff, crashing hard from the high he was riding only the briefest of seconds earlier, ran.

The proxy gave chase. The hooded man was in his territory, the hunting grounds of a faceless monster and those who serve it, and if there's any place Toby knew better than the back of his hand, it was these woods.

But Jeff didn't get this far, didn't get to live this long, if he wasn't a damn good escapist.

So, in the end, he had managed to get away. The odds were vastly against him, but Jeff was a survivor at heart and he had a track record for evening the odds and turning the losing hand the universe gave him into something passable.

Still, as the white-hooded killer grew the distance between him and the edge of those damned woods, confused and hurt not only by the still-bleeding wound at his side, but by the way his best friend had reacted, Jeff- sinking into his most selfish impulses- wanted that sense of normalcy, wanted to sink his teeth into the feeling of comfort he had gotten a mere taste of so badly and never let go, and if the world won't give him that, then he'll just have to carve that space himself.

And so, Jeff kept coming back.

It would take a good while until Toby warms up to Jeff again, both because of his reluctance to and because the both of them aren't exactly ones to stay in one place for too long, though Jeff is the one that makes sporadic appearances due to being- y'know- a known serial killer on the run.

Still, Toby does eventually grow closer to him. Especially when A) Jeff is a persistent asshole who won't miss a single second whenever he's around to visit Toby, even actively searching for him when he has the time to and getting into trouble as he does, and B) Toby just... can't bring himself to actually kill the other man. He's hated him for so, so long, but in every instance he had caught him off guard and attacked, Toby would stand, frozen in place before he could even finish the other man off.

The first time Toby had attacked Jeff led him to rsalise that something had happened to his best friend. Something bad, and something big. but God knows Jeff shouldn't be talking about how much someone had changed when he can barely even recognise the thing that stares back at him in the mirror.

His own hesitance annoyed the proxy to hell and back at first, but eventually Jeff's persistence and a lack of self preservation paid off, and Toby- either feeling too worn out to even bother, or was feeling particularly generous that one night- gave in just this once.

Then he gave in again when prompted at Jeff's next visit.

And again with the next.

And again.

And then one night, maybe, he's come to the realisation that he's started to miss the pale, deformed rat of a man who seems to know Toby better than even he himself does, to miss the ghost that had been haunting him all this time.

[larluce]

MERLIN PROMPT

Merlin is capture by some bandits for information. Normally he would escape quickly, but these ones figure out soon that he has magic and restrain him with cold Iron. They do torture him in other ways to try to make him speak, but being cut off of his magic is what really traumatizes Merlin. He manages to escape in the end, but one of the bandits shouts at him while he’s running that he will tell the king what he is. So, even when Merlin is later save and sound in Camelot, he’s in constant fear his secret will be exposed at any moment.

The thing is, when Arthur, after sending a lot of search parties, finally finds Merlin in the woods all scarred and terrified and later Merlin refuses to talk about what they did to him, yet Merlin flinches of every touch and is constantly a mervous wreck around everyone, he thinks the worst: Merlin was not only tortured, he was raped. His best friend, the person he treasures the most and has feelings for has been hurt in the worst way possible and it was his fault.

Arthur shares his suspicions with the knights, who share his grief, and they make a vow to protect Merlin. They basically take turns watching over him. Even Lancelot believes this, since Merlin hasn’t told him anything either, but he does think there's more to it, because he finds weird Merlin hasn’t been able to defend himself with his magic. They also make their own investigations to find the bastards who did this to Merlin.

Then the day comes where a man appears in the castle, saying he has relevant information for the king regarding his personal manservant. Arthur, believing is someone who has information about the bandits who took Merlin months ago, lets him in. However when the man is about to speak Merlin storms in.

Arthur: Merlin?

Bandit: (smirks at Merlin) Hello, little pet.

Merlin: (to Arthur, begging in full panic mode) Arthur, please don't listen to him!

Arthur: You know him?

Bandit: (points at Merlin) This man is a sorcerer. He killed all my men with magic!

Silence. All the knights and Arthur somber their gazes. Is not the first time Merlin is accused of magic, but it's definitely the first time he looks so terrified.

Arthur: That's a grave accusation you're making.

Bandit: I can prove it, sire. If you allow me.

Arthur: (turns to Merlin) Merlin? (Thinking) Why aren't you denying it?

Merlin: (breaks into a crying mess) I'm sorry I didn't want you to find out this way.

Bandit: You see? he confessed!

Lancelot: Wait, why did you call him like that?

Bandit: What?

Gawain: (incipient fury) You called him "little pet". Why?

Leon: That's a strange way to call the evil sorcerer who killed all your men, don't you think?

Arthur: (conects the dots, hardening his features) It was you. You are the bastard who raped him!

Merlin and Bandit: (utterly confused) ... what? 😧

Arthur: (roars in rage an launches at the bandit)

Gawain: (does the very same thing)

Elyan, Percival and Leon: (trying their best to stop Arthur and Gawain despite being as furious cause the man can't pay for his crimes if he's turn into a pulp)

Merlin: (too stunned, not knowing what's happening or how to feel)...

Lancelot: (to Merlin) He didn't do that to you, did he?

Merlin: No.

Lancelot: (sighs in relief) Should we tell them?

Merlin: Maybe later... when they are, you know, more willing to listen.

[sucrows]

Can I have D, M and V for Shu, Jun and Niki nsfw alphabet please 🙏

Requests are closed actually you know what fuck it we ball. why not. im in the mood for an alphabet ask. nobody request anything else this guy right here will be the only exception

(NSFW UNDER CUT)

[D] DIRTY SECRET

Morning wood. All the time. He hates it so much like you wouldn’t believe. It’s not actually that big of a deal but for some reason he’ll get hard no matter what he was dreaming of. Dream of his art winning an award and getting displayed in a gallery? Bricked up. Dream of going to a shrimp themed amusement park with the other eccentrics but it turns into a shopping mall where he gets lost in the bathroom? Hard as a rock. The worst thing to consistently happen to him. 

[M] MOTIVATION

Trying to get Shu riled up for sex is like playing a game of operation. It’s very easy to mess up and make him clam up and dismiss you. There is no surefire way to get Shu in the mood, but one thing he cannot resist is being worshiped by his partner. Praise by anyone else? Who cares. Getting treated tenderly and receiving loving encouragement from someone he cares about? Well... He is just a man after all. 

[V] VOLUME

He tries to stay quiet, but he always ends up making some noise. He’s generally speaking a panter and a grunter over a moaner. Just like everything regarding sex, he can be quite shy and quite particular about his performance, he struggles a lot in regards to feeling shame over making any sound during sex so be sure to give him plenty of reassurance (but not too much lest he feel coddled)! 

[D] DIRTY SECRET 

Wants and I mean WANTS to smell your underwear soooooo bad. It’s crazy how badly he wants to do it. He has too much respect and self-discipline to give in and do it but if you were to even so much as hint to being okay with it... well, he might just offer to do your laundry from then on.... totally not to hide the evidence of what he’d get on the fabric. 

[M] MOTIVATION

His own hormones and any piece of visible skin. All he has to do is look at someone he’s into for long enough and he can get turned on. If he already has a sexual relationship with someone then oh boy is he even worse. Cleavage, thighs, hands, necks, anything can catch his eye and get him going if it’s exposed. 

[V] VOLUME

Naturally on the quieter side of things. He tends to grunt a lot and is a fan of dirty talk sometimes, but he’s also more than content to just silently make you feel good without feeling the need to vocalize. He doesn’t have much shame about making noise or not making it at all, truly an unbothered king. 

[i don't have access to my main pc rn forgive me for not using niki's banner i only have so many of them]

NIKI SHIINA

[D] DIRTY SECRET

You know those “hey babe I passed out 7 times but your cinnamon rolls are ready” memes? He wants to actually give it a shot. Either on the giving or receiving end, he’s down. He recognizes it’d probably suck but will that stop him? No. Would totally try cooking something with his/your cum if you’d like. 

[M] MOTIVATION

Knowing someone else wants him is usually what gets him going. As long as he has the free time, Niki is usually down for a quick fuck but knowing someone else's eyes are on him makes him all the more excited. Sometimes hunger also gets him to feel in the mood. There’s a fine line though, if he gets too hungry, he’ll need a break to go eat or he might pass out lol. 

[V] VOLUME

He’s generally noisy. He doesn’t really try to hold himself back unless he’s worried about disturbing his neighbors. Sometimes he can even get chatty during sex. He’s a bit prone to getting distracted and letting his mind wander so sometimes, when you check in on him, he’ll start saying something completely unrelated like “We need to buy more eggs” while you’re having sex. 

[livesworthlivingau]

Behind the Vale Chapter 17

ISAT/Two Hat spoilers! CW: Some blood, wounds, hacking up blood.

"So, we gonna talk about that?"

"About what~?"

"Vale..."

"Oh, you mean meeting the universe itself randomly on our walk through the woods? Why whatever would there be to discuss about that~?" [She gives you a very unimpressed look.]

"We're gonna talk about this, Vay. Or do you just wanna let it stew again and have another tantrum?"

"… I told you that it's in the past now. I'm not them anymore, so there's nothing to discuss."

"You gotta know it's not that simple. It's gonna come up one way or another! If you don't work this out soon then we're just gonna run into them and you're gonna have all those emotions in the moment." [You stop in your tracks, grumbling some as you cross your arms. You stomp your heel in annoyance.]

"… It's very annoying that you have to be right all the time!"

"Hah, Bonnie said the same thing once~."

[You try to form your words, thinking of where to even begin with this, thinking of how any of it could be explained properly, thinking of how blinding insane every little bit of it sounds! So, we wished for help so then the universe sent us back in time as a star to help out own past self out and now we're just some twisted, corrupted copy of our former self~! Yes that'll go over fantastically…]

[Nille waits patiently, just watching and letting you collect yourself… Stars she's just as insufferable as the Fighter. You sigh heavily, taking a seat on a nearby log of a fallen tree. You wish you could summon a fainting couch for dramatic effect, but this would have to do for now.]

"… Stars, How do I even talk about this?… Anytime I try and form the words it just sounds like I've gone insane."

"More insane than having eaten a star then ripped it out of your chest?" [You glance at her, then away, nervously rubbing your arm.]

"... Oh Change, it is?"

"Yes! A-And… I don't want you to look at me like that."

"Like what, Vale?"

"Like… Like you know what I am… Like you pity me… Like I'm just a broken mess that needs to be coddled…"

"Vay…" [She speaks softly, walking over to sit beside you, a hand slowly landing upon your shoulder.]

"I'm not gonna treat you like that, I just want to understand so I ca-"

"But you can't understand! No one else in this entire blinding universe can understand!" [You shout, standing up and pacing back and forth for a moment.]

"Nille, I am begging you. The worst thing that has ever happened to me is finally over. I don't need to dig it back up, I don't need to talk about it, I can't talk about it. I just need it to be gone…" [She pauses for a moment, before giving a defeated sigh.]

"Alright… if you truly feel that way then I'll drop it. But if this starts causing problems again, you know we're gonna have to, right?"

"… Okay… Thank you, Nille." [You breath out in relief, she responds with her usual sweet smile… you feel yourself begin to relax again.]

"So, any idea how this wish is gonna work?"

"Not really, but I think it'll be obvious when it happens."

"Man, this whole wish business is weird."

"You don't know the half of it~."

----------------------------------------------------

[Nille hummed to herself, walking along the trail still with the map out, looking over the places she'd marked of where they had been, what they'd heard of the saviors, where they were going, etc.]

"Looks like the next town should be just a few hours away, then we can see if-" [She's cut off by a large sadness bursting out of a tree, slamming into the ground in front of her. It lifts a scissor sign, ready to strike.]

"Nille!!" [You cry out, rushing forward and getting into it's path, you raise your hand instinctively to summon your dagger... only to remember you can't do that anymore... Stars. The sadness strikes at you, slashing across your stomach and sending you flying back into Nille. She manages to catch you, sliding back as her boots catch the ground.]

"You okay?!" [She cried out, making sure you were fine before continuing. You nod reflexively, it was just a scissors attack after all, and she helps you back onto your feet. You ready for another attack, only to cough up some blood, falling to your knees and gripping your chest... Ow... OW! Why does that hurt so much!? It was a blinding scissors attack?!]

"Vale?! Hey! Watch it!" [Nille cries out, pulling out her hammer and deflecting it's attack. She quickly fishes a sour tonic out of her pocket and rolls it towards you. You quickly pop the cap and gulp it all down, letting out a scrunched 'blegh' at the taste before getting back to your feet. Okay... we have no weapon... this thing nearly took us out in one shot... Oh stars, what's going on?]

[Nille manages to land a few more hits on it, causing it to reel back and hiss out. In a last stand it suddenly lashed out again, you quickly raise your hand in craft, summoning a shield of force in front of her. She blinks and looks back to you, then ahead again before dealing the final blow across it. The sadness fading away. You pause for a moment, panting out, looking down at your hands, both held in a... paper sign?...]

"Wow, when did you learn how to do that, Vale?"

"... I... didn't?... I-I mean I've seen the Housemaiden use something like that before but..."

"Aren't you a piercing type? How'd you just use creation so easily?"

"... Was it the wish?..." [You mumble to yourself, looking around for a moment, then down at your sliced clothing. You make the paper sign once more, cleanly dragging across it slowly to help return it to it's tailored state.]

"H-Hah! I-I... I'm..."

"Vale?... You okay, Vay?" [Nille asked, looking at you worriedly. You're confused until you realize you're on the verge of tears.]

"O-Oh, yes, sorry~! Just uhh... Surprised is all! I guess my wish changed that too~!" [She looks like she wants to say something, but quickly drops it, knowing it would probably lead to the same questions you've already shot down several times.]

"Well, uhh... Congrats I guess!" [Supportive as always, even if she doesn't know why.]

"Anywho~! You said we were getting close to the next town, right? Let's hurry along, I could use a nice bed after all of that~." [She sighs a bit as she spots your mask quickly slipping back on, but gives a little nod and follows along.]

[thedelicatearcher]

finnick odair alphabet fluff

h - hugs

finnick odair finds peace in holding you in his arms. his heart swells with quiet joy whenever his arms are tightly wrapped around you, with his face nestled against your hair as he breathes in the familiar scent of you. with his arms wrapped around your torso, he savors the closeness of your warm body pressed against his, a rush of excitement running through his veins. finnick has always thought of you as his safe space, there’s nowhere else he feels more at peace than in your embrace. though the self-deprecating thoughts are always roaming through his mind, it’s with you that his mind grows a little quieter. 

as the next hunger games looms closer, knowing he will be forced to return to the capitol for weeks, he needs you. anxiety takes over his mind as the days go by, and he spends the days previous to the reaping battling the overwhelming urge to run away with you. 

finnick knows deep down that any attempt to leave district four in search for a better life anywhere else, even hiding and trying to live in the isolated woods, would only lead to ruin. yet, he can’t stop daydreaming about it. a quiet life far away from the capitol, finding an old abandoned cabin in the forest that it might have belonged to a rebel many years ago. he pictures a life where his only concerns would be hunting to put food on the table and keeping you safe. he dreams of how your lips would be the only ones to love on his skin, how his mind would probably be quiet if the gentle, serene sound of a river nearby joined him in his everyday, where the two of you could bathe. 

finnick has to force himself to stay grounded. he tries to be realistic and think about the harsh reality of what would happen if the capitol ever found you. he knows they would tear you apart, separating you from him, leaving him to endure months of not knowing if you’re safe, if they’re hurting you, or even if you’re still alive. he would move through each day like a lifeless shell, carrying the weight of your absence. but he can't bring himself to think about the worst scenario. tears well up in his eyes at the mere thought of them torturing you to hurt him. he accidentally spirals into panic at the idea of them cutting out your tongue, and turning you into his personal avox. a torture designed to make the strongest one crumble. that’s the only thing that keeps him from running away with you.

so, you spend the entire month before the games taking care of him. you hold him close while you lie together on the couch, whispering soothing words in his ear meant only for him. as his shaking figure clings to you with his life, your arms get tighter around him. your heart aches for him, wishing you could ease his pain, though you know it’s beyond your power. you discover that gently rubbing his back while sharing stories from your life helps him relax. his weary eyes brighten and he chuckles softly as he hears you describing how you got denied entrance to the career training academy after accidentally falling on top of one of the men in charge at the auditions. you never voice a single complaint about the weeks leading up to the games, when he needs to sleep draped over you for comfort. your fingers caress his sun-kissed cheek as the room fills with his soft  snores, ignoring the numbness in your arm pinned beneath his body.

on the day of the reaping, you wait for him at the train station, staying out of sight of the cameras that are trying to capture the tributes fearful or, on the other end of the spectrum, arrogant expressions. when he arrives, he greets you with a hug before you can finish registering in your mind that it’s him. “honey,” his shaky voice captures your ears. even though he is taller than you, he leans down to be completely enveloped by your arms like a cocoon. finnick immediately begins to ramble about his concerns for the tributes, worried that one of them might actually have a chance to win. he buries his face in your neck, seeking for your sweet scent to calm him down. when the train speaker announces that departure is imminent, he holds you tighter. out of habit, you cup his face in your hands and rest your forehead against his as you always do in private. “i’ve got you, honey. just come back to me,” you whisper softly, wishing you could go with him. “i love you so much,” he breathes out in reply, his hands tightening around you as if reluctant to let go. “don’t take any risks while i’m gone,” he rambles, anxious about what could happen in his absence.you let him give you his instructions, even though most of them are obvious, knowing he won’t be at ease until he’s said them all. finally, he pulls away, giving you a soft but desperate kiss before boarding the train. your only wish is for him to come back to your arms.

[daryltwdixon]

The Heart of Us: Chapter 20

Daryl

The woods are quiet. Too quiet for Daryl’s liking.

The crunch of leaves underfoot is the only sound, broken now and then by the occasional rustle of branches in the breeze. Daryl walks a few paces ahead of Aaron, his crossbow slung low across his shoulder. His eyes flicker over the treeline, always searching, always scanning. Stopping would feel like giving up, but at least the day hadn’t taken a turn for the worst like it so often could these days. 

“Another dead end,” Aaron mutters behind him. His voice is calm but edged with disappointment. “No tracks, no fires, no sign of anyone. It’s like people don’t even exist out here anymore.”

Daryl doesn’t answer, his jaw tightening as he steps over a fallen log. His grip on the crossbow strap adjusts, the leather creaking under the pressure of his hand. The truth is, Aaron’s right. They’ve been driving all day with nothing to show for it. No people, no leads, no hope of a worthwhile recruit. Just empty woods and silence.

But that ain’t what’s making his stomach twist.

His thoughts keep drifting, no matter how much he tries to shake them loose. Back to Alexandria. Back to her.

Y/N.

She’s there. She’s safe—he keeps telling himself that. Though the drama with Rick is fresh in both their minds, he at least can hope she’s safe. She’s good with her knife, smarter and faster than most of them now. Daryl just hopes whatever job she got assigned–if any–it kept her busy and out of harm’s way.

The thought nags at him. Did she get assigned something smart? Somethin’ safe? Or somethin’ stupid? 

These Alexandrians had a habit of making stupid choices.

He grimaces, the leather strap of his crossbow digging into his shoulder. He should’ve checked in before they left this morning. Should’ve made sure she wasn’t going out on one of Deanna’s runs or playing hero like Glenn always does.

Aaron’s voice pulls him back. “We should head back,” he says, his words hesitant, like he’s half-expecting a fight. “It’s getting dark. We can call it for the day, rest up, and try again in a couple days, go further out. We could pack for overnight.”

Daryl hesitates mid-step. His gut twists at the thought of returning so soon. The day’s been a bust—no recruits, no progress—and going back to Alexandria empty-handed doesn’t sit right with him. But the thought of seeing her…

He adjusts his grip again, shifting the weight of the crossbow. “Yeah,” he mutters finally, the word coming out rough and reluctant. “Fine.”

Aaron glances at him, but he doesn’t say anything, just nods and turns back toward the vehicles. Daryl follows, his boots crunching over dried leaves. The closer they get to Alexandria, the tighter the knot in his chest pulls.

By the time they roll through the gates, the sky has darkened to a deep navy, the faint glow of lanterns lighting the quiet streets. Daryl kills the engine of his bike and listens to the low creak of the gate closing behind them. Something feels off. The usual chatter—the soft murmur of voices, the occasional laugh—is gone. The air feels heavier, tense.

Aaron slams his car door shut first, his frown deepening as he glances around. “Something’s up,” he says quietly, looking into one of the windows of the houses–Deanna and Reg sitting together looking solemn.

Daryl doesn’t answer, his stomach already twisting. He slings his crossbow over his shoulder and heads toward their shared houses, his boots thudding against the pavement. The first thing he notices when he steps inside is Glenn. He’s sitting in the living space, his head bowed, his shoulders slumped like he’s holding up the weight of the world.

“Glenn,” Daryl says, his voice cutting through the silence. “Somethin’ happen?”

Glenn looks up, and the grief in his eyes stops Daryl cold. His face is pale, his lips pressed into a thin line that trembles as he opens his mouth to speak. “We went on a run today,” he says, his voice tight. “It went bad. Really bad. We lost Noah and Aiden.”

Daryl’s stomach sinks, but Glenn isn’t finished. “Deanna’s…” He trails off, exhaling shakily. “Everyone’s upset. It—it was bad, Daryl.”

Daryl swallows hard, his grip tightening on the strap of his crossbow. “Shit,” he mutters.

After a long pause, he looks to the stairs, ready to get into bed, the exhaustion of the long day and now all of this suddenly heavy. The loss of two people…one of their own, too… All Daryl can think about is getting to bed, seeing Y/N, and letting the weight of it all fade for a little while.

His eyes flick to the stairs, the pull of rest and her warmth stronger than his unease. He’s already moving toward them, ready to find her, to see her face and hear her voice. She’ll have something to say about all this, a sharp observation or maybe just the comfort of her silence. He needs it. Needs her.

But Glenn’s voice stops him dead in his tracks.

“Daryl—” Glenn’s voice cracks, the sound raw and unsteady. When Daryl turns, the look on his face feels like a fist closing around his chest.

“She didn’t make it back.”

The words slam into him, knocking the air clean out of his lungs. His hand grips the banister, the rough wood digging into his palm as he stares at Glenn, waiting—no, willing him to take it back.

Daryl feels like the floor is shifting beneath him, the world tilting. “What the hell d’you mean, she went with you?” His voice rises, rough and guttural. “Why’d she go? Why didn’t you stop her?”

“We didn’t know it’d go like this,” Glenn says, his voice cracking again. “She drew them away, Daryl. She—” He falters, his head shaking as if the memory itself is too much to bear. “She tried to save us. She told us to go, that she’d handle it. But…” He swallows hard, his next words barely a whisper. “I saw them take her down.”

The world seems to tilt sideways. The air feels heavy, thick, like it’s closing in on him. Daryl stares at Glenn, his vision narrowing, the words echoing in his head: She drew them away. I saw them take her down.

His chest tightens, his breaths coming in short, shallow bursts. “You saw…” He can’t finish the thought, can’t bring himself to say the words.

“I’m sorry,” Glenn says, his voice breaking completely. “I tried—we tried to get to her, but there were too many. Tara needed medical help and...I’m so sorry, Daryl.”

Daryl doesn’t respond. He doesn’t trust himself to speak. His jaw clenches as he turns sharply, his boots thudding against the stairs as he takes them two at a time. His chest feels like it’s caving in, the weight of Glenn’s words crushing him with every step.

When he reaches their room, he throws the door open, his breath hitching as his eyes land on the bed. It’s made, untouched. The sight of it hits him like a blow, the ache in his chest spreading like wildfire. She should be here. She should be waiting for him, curled up under the blankets with that stubborn tilt to her lips when he finally crawls in beside her. But she isn’t.

It’s empty. It feels like the final nail driving into his chest.

He turns sharply, his boots slamming against the wooden floor as he flies out the door. Glenn’s voice calls after him from the bottom of the stairs, desperate and pleading.

“Daryl! Daryl, stop! There’s nothing you can—”

But Daryl doesn’t stop. He barrels down the steps, his jaw clenched tight and his fists balled at his sides. The air feels suffocating inside the house, pressing down on him like it’s trying to choke him. He doesn’t think. He just moves, slamming the front door open and striding into the night.

He doesn’t know where he’s going. Doesn’t care. All he knows is that he can’t stay here—not when every corner, every shadow, reminds him of her.

Not when the thought of her being gone feels like it might tear him apart.

➳

Rick

Rick leans against the porch railing, the cool night air brushing against his skin. The tension in Alexandria is suffocating, thick with the weight of bad news. Glenn and Nicholas returned hours ago, their faces pale and drawn as they recounted what went wrong. Noah. Aiden. Gone.

Tara was still at the infirmary, Eugene keeping vigil at her side. Rick could only hope they wouldn’t lose anyone else tonight. His gut churned as Glenn’s voice echoed in his mind, low and full of regret: "She drew them away, Rick. She tried to save us. I—I saw her go down."

Rick clenches his jaw, the image of Y/N surrounded by walkers flashing unbidden in his head. He hadn’t even known she’d gone on the run until Deanna mentioned it offhand. Last minute. No time to stop her. That hadn’t made it any easier to hear Glenn’s account of how it ended. He doesn’t know how to tell Daryl, doesn’t know if he can. He had planned to wait until morning, to gather himself, but the sound of boots on gravel draws his attention.

Daryl.

He’s coming down the street with a purpose, his crossbow slung low across his back. His movements are sharp, deliberate, each step radiating a tension that Rick recognizes all too well. Daryl’s got that look—the kind that says someone’s about to get hurt, and it might just be him.

Rick straightens, stepping off the porch to intercept him. “Daryl,” he calls out, his tone cautious but firm. “What’s goin’ on?”

Daryl doesn’t stop, his jaw clenched tight, his eyes fixed straight ahead. “Did you know she went on the run today?” he growls, his voice rough and full of accusation.

Rick’s heart sinks. Of course, he knows. He’s been carrying the weight of it all evening, and now it feels heavier than ever. He falls into step beside Daryl, his voice steady but low. “Yeah,” he says. “Deanna told me.”

“And no one told me?”

“You were already gone, Daryl,” Rick says, his temper flaring but he keeps it in check. “Glenn said she wasn’t supposed to go. It was last minute,” he starts, his voice low. “He said she drew the walkers away, told them to leave. She saved them, Daryl. She—” He falters, his voice tightening. “She went down. Glenn said he saw her. The walkers—”

“Don’t,” Daryl cuts him off, his voice rough and barely controlled. “Don’t say it.”

Rick hesitates, the weight of Daryl’s glare pressing against him. He nods once, continuing more carefully. “Glenn said there were too many. They couldn’t get to her.”

Daryl’s hands tremble at his sides, his jaw tightening as his breathing grows uneven. “He saw it,” he says, the words almost a growl.

Rick nods. “That’s what he told me.”

Daryl shakes his head, taking a step back. “Bullshit,” he mutters. “That’s bullshit. She ain’t gone. She ain’t—” His voice cracks, and he turns abruptly, storming past Rick.

“Daryl,” Rick calls, his voice firm. He steps in front of him, blocking his path. “I know what you’re thinkin’, and you can’t do it. Not tonight.”

“Get outta my way,” Daryl growls, his voice low and dangerous.

“Listen to me,” Rick says sharply, his eyes locking with Daryl’s. “It’s pitch black out there, and you don’t even know what you’re walkin’ into. You go out there now, you’re gonna get yourself killed.”

“She’s out there!” Daryl shouts, his voice cracking with anger and grief. “She’s out there, and you’re tellin’ me to sit on my ass and do nothin’?”

“I’m tellin’ you to wait,” Rick says firmly. “We go first thing in the morning. All of us. You go out there now, you’re not helpin’ her—you’re just makin’ it worse.”

Daryl’s chest heaves, his fists trembling as his anger radiates off him. “She ain’t gone,” he mutters, his voice breaking. “Not ‘til I see it.”

Rick’s jaw tightens, his own grief buried beneath the need to stay steady. “Then we’ll go,” he says. “First thing. But not tonight.”

For a long moment, Daryl doesn’t move. His eyes dart toward the gate, his body taut with barely restrained fury. Finally, he takes a sharp breath, jerking his head in a stiff nod before turning and stalking off into the night.

[muselixer]

dumb things my friends and I have said: 2024!

part four: october - december apologies ahead of time for length! feel free to change pronouns if need be. warning for foul and dirty language, suggestiveness, and capslock-implied yelling :)

"They come when I'm ready."

"I'll come up. I gotta get wood."

"I think they will really like my shaft."

"I need you to help me take my pants off."

"Oh my god, guys! We're just like Snoop Dogg!"

"I don't care if they DNA test it! They're not gonna know how many toes were in the bathwater!"

"Fuck you. I'm un-circumcising your PushPop."

"That's okay, it happens to the best of us. And the worst of us. That's why Hitler happened."

"THEY WON'T GIVE ME HIS FORESKIN."

"THEY HAVE FORESKIN ON ETSY?"

"THAT IS A CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE HORSE."

"Take a tampon, soak it in vodka, and shove it up your cooch."

"You put pepper on your thumb, and then sniff it, and then sneeze the whole time. It's really fun."

"Hi, I have a question. Please be nice to me, I failed college."

"I totally get being scared to pull out."

"That's called childhood trauma. That's called cold pizza."

"Can we stop flirting in the gay bathroom?"

"Dawg, I have so much coffee in my coffee."

"I don't know if I've whipped you before."

"I DON'T NEED THERAPY, I NEED TO WIN."

"If they showed up in real life, the asexuality would leave my body."

"Have you ever had a food so good?"

"Do you think there are emotional prostitutes out there?"

"I feel like I'm floating, but if the floating was evil."

"They look like that cat meme with the eyebrow. Wait, don't tell them I said that."

"Pull up to the date like... Kachow."

"A SECOND TRAIN HAS HIT THE INTERSECTION."

"Don't look at me like that. You look like a hand-drawn frowny face."

"In terms of hitting, this chicken's kind of a pacifist."

"TECHNICALLY, Mary cheated on Joseph with God."

"Oh, I'm sorry, am I being too manly? In my little manly sweater? In my little sweater that everyone likes?"

"Topdog? What's topdog? I'm a hands-on learner by the way."

"Paleontologists don't seek dinosaur bones just to fuck a dinosaur."

"I'm fina going to leave the group chat."

"Tell her a washboard is only 20 bucks at the hardware store, since clearly she doesn't want a washer."

"I already know your fuck head drinks Pepsi."

"Let's grasp it together, fellow idiot."

"Is he a couch fucker?"

"Do you have any proof that you don't fuck tape?"

"Please do not fuck the gutter pipe."

"This implies Christ is a chicken."

"You could kill me as an act of bullying and I wouldn't care."

"It'd be kinda fucked up if there wasn't any garlic in the garlic dressing."

"You guys are like what sitcoms think siblings are."

"If I want to get pegged by a cowboy, do I have to cut off his dick and give him a strap?"

"Are you a peg-ologist, by chance?"

"That's how you know this was organized by a straight man. You gotta come too early."

"Do you think Jesus gages his hand holes?"

"I hate to fat shame a letter, but..."

"No, you're not! O, Q, and D are fine! G is just doing something weird with its body!"

[rainsoftenings]

pls give us ur analysis on transfem nonbinary tenma 🤲

hello ken!! of coarse... preemptive disclaimer before anything else that i myself am not transfem nor do i claim to speak for them. i have just simply observed that a lot of the problems tenma seems to face are also rlly common transfem-specific issues. you can make a fairly strong argument for a transfem tenma reading imo. putting this under a cut bc it got kind of Long

ok in order to talk abt this. we have to talk abt eva. i am not naive enough to write off eva as all bad bc she DOES have redeeming qualities and is not to blame for everything that happened to them. but i do think eva was uniquely bad for their already poor self-esteem and that they likely latched onto eva as hard as they did in order to feel Normal. from the information we are given abt their childhood both in the main story and in Another Monster, as well as lunge's observations that they don't even fit in among other japanese people, it's clear tenma has felt marginalized and/or stripped of agency for a very, very long time. their family dynamic (cold mother who openly favored their half-siblings over them, father who pressured them to become a doctor for his own personal gain. their only sibling who still talks to them only does so bc he wants them to take his job) as well as their willingness to bond with people who hurt them (it is specifically mentioned that they made friends with their childhood bullies, who called them a sissy and left them alone in the woods. this only happened bc they were impressed with tenma's bravery in staying out overnight) seems to have led them to minimize their own desires and become extremely meek. arguably them fleeing to germany in order to escape their father's desire to have them work at his hospital was their best attempt at fighting this, but it backfired bc the heinemanns immediately picked up on their vulnerabilities and exploited them.

back to eva. where udo preying on tenma's insecurities and desire for approval was certainly intentional, the worst part abt their relationship with eva is that i dont even think eva was consciously aware of what she was doing to them/their feelings in general. she is very much a person whose life was meticulously laid out for her in advance and when it diverged from this plan she ended up at a complete loss. her insistence that they did "everything she asked" (with the sexual implication being extremely obvious) as well as them acquiescing to doing things they don't like in order to feel worthy of her love (to the point of even letting her pick out their outfits!)... well, it reads a LOT like comptop to me. it seems very similar to the relationship between trianon and oenone from serious weakness at times; though they differ in several key aspects, it's clear that when they got together both tenma and eva were looking at each other more symbolically than holistically. to tenma, eva was the normalcy and love they so desperately craved; to eva, tenma was supposed to not only be subservient to her (bc she cant imagine not being doted on), they were also supposed to be the Husband and rake in lots of money for the hospital, in essence putting them to the same end as their father initially wanted for them without consideration if that's what they actually want. losing eva causes tenma to get a fuller picture of who she rlly is very quickly, but it takes eva So much longer to do the same for them. and the heartbreaking thing abt this is that even though eva backstabs them several times and makes attempts on their life, whenever she's in danger they instantly go to great lengths to save her. it's second nature to them

this damaging selflessness doesnt extend to just eva, either- it's arguably the entire basis of their character. i think it's very interesting (read: sad) that in addition to their kindness simply biting them in the ass multiple times/tenma deliberately disallowing themself anger and smoothing over relations with ppl who have betrayed them in the past bc theyre so desperate for anyone to be their friend or ally, this is nearly always paired with bodily neglect. we literally see tenma struggle to eat consistently over the course of the manga, from smth as simple as a waitress deliberately offering them extra soup when she sees that theyve not eaten anything, to stuff as dramatic as them collapsing in prison from lack of food and sleep and needing hospitalization. im tempted to highlight the contrast between grimmer having a picnic with them out of nowhere and eva deliberately ruining the picnic they tried to have with her too but i feel like that's fairly well trodden ground analytically, but it still deserves a mention here. they are notably more gaunt by the end of the series than they were when they started out, i think it's most obvious when you see they've cut their hair back to its original length and it serves to emphasize that they'll never be the same person again. i think it's also noteworthy (though certainly unintentional) that urasawa uses them growing out their stubble as a marker that their mental health is yet again at its lowest. i am reminded of the time i took a dissociation test and it gave me a result that ppl with eating disorders typically score. i don't think i have one, just dysphoria, but with tenma it seems a lot like both at once.

put all together, and given the themes of the manga? i dont think transition would save tenma. not even close. but they should do it anyway if only because it would be an easy way for them to start being kinder to themself again, a skill they badly need to learn. if they could just take that first step toward giving themself a little mercy i think they would be a lot happier with themself. they already have two kids who love them completely unconditionally, i think having that extra support would be great for them! and also i think they're hot and i'd like to see ppl draw (NORMAL, NON RACIST) art of them in dresses and with sweaty small boobs and so on. Sue me ngl the nonbinary part is simply bc i think theyd feel some distance from womanhood after having been excluded from society in multiple ways for so long, that little extra bit of dehumanization tends to manifest in weird ways wrt ppl's internal perception of gender. and imo theyd be so tired by the end of everything that i highly doubt theyd enjoy being thrust into an entirely new set of gendered pressures and just want to skip the whole business. but i am open to any and all permutations of transfem tenma. i want them to be happy!! in conclusion:

[divineprank]

Solving a 25 year old mystery...

Very early on in the game, we're informed that if the Kokiri dare step outside of the forest, they will die. That's a fairly heavy statement, but it does line up with more lore that we end up picking up as the game carries on. Anyways, this forest is a secluded, protected and magical place, a small haven that is effectively cut off from the rest of the world. As we carry on through the game, we learn that anyone who is lost within these enchanted woods--anyone who is NOT a Kokiri--will twist into one of two creatures: a Skull Kid if you are a child, and if you are an adult you will transform into a Stalfos. Why this happens is still a mystery, but one can guess it's likely connected to the Deku Tree's magic and the Kokiri being a vulnerable race. They're so precious to the Great Deku Tree; he views them as his children after all, and his children MUST be protected!

Makes sense, right?

So why is it, at the end of the game, we actually see a bunch of Kokiri outside the forest, partying it up with Guru-Guru at Lon Lon Ranch? They're spinning him on his organ grinder, and we even see a lonesome Mido situated next to a heartsick King Zora, both of them missing their special person.

Q: The Kokiri tribe is outside the forest at the ending. And the Zora too...

A: This is because Link's success has wiped out the evil forces, and the range of the Deku Tree Sprout protecting the forest has been expanded. The Zoras do not need to be immersed in water all the time. (Kawagoe, Cinema Scene Director).

And there it is! The answer to a burning question that many people have been wanting to know for twenty-five years now! The worst part is, this interview was published in an April 1999 issue of Nintendo 64Dream Magazine! We've had the answer to this question given to us only FIVE MONTHS after the game launched, and yet still to this day I think it is one of the most-asked questions about Ocarina of Time! Funny how things happen that way, huh?

[Source!]

...Aaactually, since I mentioned it...

Remember the cute little boy who is practically enamored with Dampé, the grave keeper? The one whose father you give the Keaton mask to and the very same child you give the Spooky Mask to?

According to this very same Dream64 magazine interview, this child ends up going missing before Link wakes up seven years later. In fact, five years after Ganondorf had invaded the sacred realm, this poor kid ended up taking it upon himself to search for his missing father, (the Hylian soldier stationed in front of Death Mountain's gate - the guy you trade the Keaton mask to!). Upon searching the forest for his father, he became lost and tragically succumbed to the forest's curse. He transformed into a Skull Kid at eight years old and apparently had an encounter with Link. He didn't bother to attempt communicating with Link, asking if he knew where his father was because Skull Kids don't trust adults. He attacked Link instead and I hate to think where that ended up.

Q:  Where did the little stalker in the graveyard go when you were in your time (became an adult)? A: Five years later, when he was eight years old, he wandered into the Lost Woods in search of his missing father and got lost. At that time, he became a Skull Kid. Skull Kid don’t talk to adults, so when he encountered adult Link, he just attacked him and didn't ask him what happened to him. (Koizumi, 3D System Director).

Grog is actually mentioned in this magazine, too... You know, the "People are disgusting!" guy? After we are given the medicine from the Odd Mushroom he had given us, we don't get to see Grog again. Instead, Fado appears and tells us that everybody who enters the forest turns into a Stalfos. Everybody. Stalfos. The dark and frankly unsatisfying conclusion to Grog's story, just after giving the poor fellow an ounce of hope, is quite jarring and it only left folks with more questions.

Q: What happened to Cucco Lady’s brother after he gave you the mushrooms?

A: Fado, the Kokiri girl who is waiting for you, is saying a meaningful message. "They all become Stalfos.” That's right, everyone who wanders into the Lost Forest becomes a Stalfos and lives in the Forest Temple. What? What about the human Link? Well, they are not Kokiri... Why is that? (Koizumi, 3D System Director).

While it's not a lot of information, we are given a piece of lore that gets my imagination firing off... Why would Grog--or any Stalfos--be drawn to the Forest Temple? Interestingly, if you show the Skull Mask to some of the Deku Scrubs, they will refer to the mask as looking like their "sacred forest totem". Could the Stalfos be related?

And for THAT matter... Why does the Skull Mask look so similar to Phantom Ganon's face?

[resvarie]

Do you have some Ami's voice lines?

this took so long… i wrote this before 2.6 before rappa voice lines were released so bear with me! they’re all below the cut 😎

First Meeting:

You can call me Amihan. I'm just a lone drifter amongst the stars, no need to pay me any mind. Unless you need parts, of course. Don't ask me where I source them though, haha…

Greetings:

Heya! Wonder what sort of treasures we’ll dig up today?

Parting:

Fair winds, my friend! I’m sure we’ll find our way back to each other soon enough.

About Self: Captain

I wouldn’t call myself a captain, but I am the only member of the S.S. Nova, so everything falls to me. Navigation, repairs, cleaning, keeping stock… Solo ship life keeps you humble.

About Self: Mechanical Peg Leg

My leg? I carved the wooden bit myself. I lost it in a freak accident when I was wrestling a shark on my home planet— or maybe it was when I fought against that brute from the Annihilation gang.. or was it when I was doing repairs on my ship and that piece of metal fell— Ah! I’m getting carried away here, aren’t I? I’ll tell you another time!

Chat: Business

If you’re ever in need of some scrap metal or ahem, IPC approved goods, just message me. I have dealings in the trade– and you won’t have to pay the abhorrent prices they put up on the market.

Chat: Principles

You gotta give to take, everything has balance in this universe. Just so happens that I like giving miscreants a good flogging, and I like taking their belongings as my payment, and sharing that with people who really need it.

Hobbies

I like making these little carvings in my spare time… This one’s a horse, this one’s a dog. Um, this one’s supposed to be a shark. I’m not used to this kind of wood, so it’s hard for me to get the shape right. N-No, it’s not an excuse!

Annoyances

This might sound odd coming from me, but I get the worst motion sickness when someone else is at the wheel. No offense to Pom-Pom.

Something to Share

Look, I don’t believe in luck. If you want something you can’t just dawdle, waiting for something to happen. You need to take action. That’s all we can do in this universe.

Knowledge

Lushaka is a place filled with flooded ruins and seas so blue it’s hard to see where the water ends and the sky begins. The scholars there have tried to tell me about the ruins, but honestly, I’m more interested in the sunken treasures that are waiting to be found…

About Boothill

He’s a reckless one, isn’t he? We galaxy rangers tend to work alone, but you wouldn’t believe the amount of times he’s dragged me into the fray, even if it is just the tail end of whatever mess he’s gotten himself into. Not like I don’t enjoy it though, heh.

About Boothill 2

…I have a lot of respect for Boothill. I envy him sometimes, but deep down, I know I could never do what he could. To have everything taken like that… it’s… *sigh*

About Rappa

It might be a little hard to keep up with her way of… communicating, but I promise you, she’s got a good head on her shoulders. I trust her judgement. She reminds me of my little sister…

About Rappa 2

The Cosmic Ninjutsu Inscriptions? Rappa tries to teach me, but it just goes in through one ear and out the other for me. I’m not too good with words and remembering things like that, but I’m happy to indulge her.

About Aventurine

Ugh, if I have to hear him speak about luck again, I might just send myself overboard. Is it really luck if he’s putting in that much effort to scheme and calculate the outcome?

About Sampo

Sounds awfully like this guy who keeps undercutting me online– Once, I even tried to buy from him just to see if he was legit. Turns out he’s all talk. He even pretended to be a bot when I confronted him… No integrity!

About Himeko

I met Himeko and the Astral Express once upon a time, she offered me an incredibly bitter cup of coffee whilst talking my ear off about fixing the Express. I could only understand a quarter of what she was saying… but wow, she’s amazing to do all of that by herself.

Eidolon Activation

Dead men tell no tales.

Character Ascension

There she blows!

Max Level Reached

Time to take this seriously.

Trace Activation

All hands on deck!

Added to Team With Boothill

Keep up, cowboy!

Added to Team with Rappa

Er, how does it go again.. As the Cosmic Ninjutsu Inscriptions read: “Let’s kick some serious butt!”

Added to Team with Trailblazer

Up for some treasure hunting after this? Saw some untouched trash cans on my way here.

EXTRA:

rappa and boothills voicelines for ami

About Captain Yukaze

The Captain's attempts at learning the Cosmic Ninjutsu Inscriptions are commendable, but it seems she has a long way to go if she wishes to reach an acceptable level of ninjutsu. I worry for her…

About Ami

Ami’s saved my behind more than a couple of times— I owe her, but uh, I’m not too sure on how to really pay her back, plus she always denies whatever I throw at her, insisting she doesn’t need it. She’s not good with her drink, so a good malt’s out the window and she’s pretty set in her ways with her weapons so I can’t get her something new… I’m at my wits end here…